Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart.
Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language.
Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them.
It is a question of experiencing everything.
At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.

I always loved Rilke’s „Letters to a young poet“.
I found comfort and relief in living my questions. Taking the speed out. Since I can remember I have been looking for answers.
All those answers „that can’t be given to me, because I couldn’t live them“. Always suffering in impatience.

Until three weeks ago everything changed and finally I realized what Rilke had meant after all.

Somewhere in the middle of a landscape I had never imagined anything of, surrounded by beauty in all its shapes, colors and tremendously inspiring souls, I found that one question I always have been waiting for to live:

WHY?

What is my why?

This is it.
This is all that matters.
That one questions that conquers all. Overshadows everything, dominates everything.
The one question that imposes all the other questions to come:
Who am I?
And who do I want to be?
What do I love?
Which life do I want to live?
What purpose do I want to give my life?
What makes me happy?

WHY?

Now, three weeks later, I ask myself, did it really happen? Fragments of memories flash into my mind. How we laughed, revealed, remembered. Not only the beauty in our lives but also all the darkness. How we cried all those tears which brought us closer to our inner circle, the place where our why is hidden. Hidden by all the distractions, all our shortcomings, fears, doubts, imperfections, insecurities but also all that longings. And all the love we carry in us.

This workshop was not about photography, it was about digging deep in us.
Through the darkness.
Sometimes through hell.
But also through beauty.
And always through love.
That universal love we transform into our work. That love that reveals itself when we stop looking around, copying, envying, fearing and instead…
Start creating.
Creating what we love.
Inspiring who we’d love to work with.
Attracting beauty into our lives.

Rumi once said:

Gratitude is like wine for the soul, come and get drunk with me!

I feel drunk now. Drunk on gratitude.

For Eddy and his love he transformed in the gorgeous meals he created. (And the sarcasm…;-)

For my four new soulmates Kitty, Carmen, Hannah and Diana I shared some of the most intense days, hours, moments of the last years. And for the best best best road trip of my life!

And for Nadia.
Obviously for Nadia, who I fell in love with, not even knowing a single photo she had taken.
For bringing us together.
For creating what no one had imagined anything of.
For all the love you share.
For all you give.

And for Julia and Ben. Relationship means to relate to someone else. These two go far beyond. They live their love so honestly it’s hard not to envy them for it.

Thank you all.

And today? I have a lifetime of questions ahead. But I finally know where to start. The curser is blinking. The words are waiting. The gap wants to be filled. Let’s do this.

What’s YOUR why?


Photoshoot and Inspiration Credits

The woman who has found her why, my mentor, my inspiration in so many ways:

The four soulmates and gifted colleagues:

The gorgeous models:

The  Crew: